Back to Beck

Oh, hey there.  I know I'm a week late, but I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving.

Do you see that?  That was my feeble attempt at distracting you from the fact that I stopped doing my balance evaluations.  You know, the ones I was supposed to be doing for 21 days?

Why did I stop?  Eh, not sure.  Some ideas:

• I got bored.
• I got distracted.  
• I didn't want to fess up to the gross overindulgence that was the entire Thanksgiving weekend.
• I felt it wasn't really doing what I set out to do.

Those are all probably true to some extent.  That last one is key.  What do I really want to do?  What is my ultimate goal?  I know I said it was finding balance, but I think what I really, really want in the long-term is to think like a thin person.  So I decided on a new 21-day goal: Follow (and finish) Beck Diet Solution. 

I pulled the book out of a drawer earlier this week and dusted off the cover, and much to my surprise, there were these big letters on the (beautiful, hot pink) cover declaring that the book would, in fact, teach me how to think like a thin person.  It was meant to be!

 In all honesty, the fact that this is what it claims to do was probably buried in my subconscious, drawing me back to the book.  But it's been a while, like 6 months, since I last picked it up, so my conscious mind definitely did not recall that yellow claim. 

I debated not reading the introductory 4 chapters.  After all, I had read them before.  Did I really need to read them again?  Couldn't I just dive right in?  Well, I'm glad I read it, because it just confirmed that this is the right path for me at the moment.

Some key points from the opening chapters:

"The Beck Diet Solution teaches you how to avoid cheating; how to resist tempting food, even if it's on the table right in front of you; and how to cope with hunger, cravings, stress, and strong negative emotions without turning to food for comfort. You'll also learn how to motivate yourself to exercise, even if you're not naturally inclined to do so. You'll discover how to do all the things you need to do to diet successfully - by changing the way you think." (pg 17)

 Sounds good to me!  I definitely need to change the way I think.

"The Beck Diet Solution teaches you how to get yourself to eat the way you're supposed to eat. It shows you how to talk back to the I don't want to, I don't have to, or I can't voice in your head." (pg 19)

Is this chick in my head or what?  How does she know about the I don't want to, I don't have to voices?  She's clearly been reading about my recent severe case of the IDGAFs.

"Thin people have faith in their ability to make good decisions about what, when, and how much they're going to eat - and to follow through with these decisions." (Pg 39)

Okay, she is in my head!  First of all, that's totally want I want.  To make good decisions about what, when, and how much to eat, and to actually follow through.  Secondly, I have come to realize that I can trust myself.  I don't recognize signals that I'm becoming full.  I don't trust myself to stick to my plans.  I keep telling myself I'm great at making plans, but not so great at executing them.  (I probably need to change that story!) I've come to even doubt that I'm making the right decisions about what to eat.  I need to reset my mind!

"...most thin people restrict their eating to some degree... They accept these limitations without too much struggle... You, however, might frequently reflect on how unfair it is that others can eat what they want but you can't. Truth is, not only do you underestimate how much others restrict themselves, but also you overly focus on the injustice you feel because you have to limit yourself." (Pg 39)

It's true.  I do think it's unfair that I can't eat fast food 5 times a week.  She included  a transcript with one of her clients who was talking about how it was unfair that other people could eat pizza and donuts.  Those are my traditional binge foods, so it seem she's not only in my head but in my... stomach?  No, that's weird.  Shopping cart. 

"Readiness is more complicated than simply wanting to change." (pg 46)

I just really liked that.


Anyway, I'm ready.  It's time to really make these changes.  I've completed days 1 and 2 so far.  My Advantages Response Card (the reasons why I want to lose weight) can be found on the Why? page.
For Day 2, we're asked to select 2 diets.  A primary diet, and a back up.

My primary diet (surprise, surprise) is Weight Watchers Points Plus (and I hear there are some exciting new changes rolling out this weekend).  I like it because it's flexible, encourages nutritious choices, is reasonable, and has worked for me in the past.

My back up diet will be the Mediterranean Diet.  I don't think that's surprising, either.  I chose it because it also encourages nutritious choices, is fairly flexible (though, I don't think they'd approve of my recent Wendy's escapades), and encourages eating real, wholesome foods.  Also, I could probably stand to eat more fish and less beef.  Oh, and it's totally cool with some red wine at dinner.  That's super important.